posted 06-21-2001 05:04 PM            

I'll start (and yes, one per post!):

"You are the Weakest Link, Good Bye!" --Head in a Trenchcoat.

Yeah, that bitch in in a trenchcoat. What is up with her? Come on, there are plenty of nice dignified people in Britain...couldn't they gang up and beat the bitch senseless? Come on, UK, I was counting on you!!

posted 06-21-2001 05:09 PM            

"If You Haven't Seen It, It's New To You." --NBC promotion for summer reruns.

Oh, come on!! Why not just save the money and the dignity and say "Don't you remember these supposedly funny shows? Watch them again?" It's just pathetic.

And I don't care about David "Help Me Please" Spade's robot dance, or that heroin addict from "Will & Grace" doing his very best to help his brain detoriation by acting as spastic as Roseanne's rectum during a lukewarm turkeyfest.

posted 06-21-2001 06:24 PM            

To this day I've detested that...dunno if you could call it a catch phrase, but people use it recklessly anyhow.

posted 06-21-2001 06:28 PM            

commments on that- THE TACO BELL IN OUR TOWN IS A PILE OF SHIT! A while ago, the wrestling team was eating there and all the players got sick- why? BECAUSE THERE WAS HUMAN CRAP IN THE FOOD!!!!! They closed it down, and found out it was the 3rd worst Taco Bell EVER!!!!!!

posted 06-21-2001 06:31 PM            

Ewww! Go away from me! I don't want cooties!!

posted 06-21-2001 08:21 PM            

Yeah, that happened at a Burger King in Ypsilanti (the ghetto next to Ann Arbor). After two years of being a deserted restaurant/drug haven, they finally got new ownership and opened. So far, they've only been known as a place dumb black drugdealers knock off for pocket change on their way to a third strike.

White drugdealers hit the Walgreens. Go fig.

Anyway, why couldn't the UK keep old "Head in a Trenchcoat?" I mean, are they that desperate for good programming that they dug up that ol corpse??

posted 06-22-2001 06:56 PM            

Selfish, I know, but I work for it...I shouldn't have to be expected to give it up for some dorks who in most cases are perfectly fit to work.

posted 06-22-2001 10:05 PM            

"Modern Classic"--this beautiful oxymoron was introduced to me when, after coming home, I switched on NBC and found out that the world is so dull that this Saturday, NBC will show the 20th Anniversary of the most important movie of 1982 "Trading Places."

Yeah, the movie you see sometimes on TBS. The one even they realize is dishwater dull and only pull out of the dust every twelve months to make sure the $20 they spent on the rights is going to keep for another year.
Plus, Dateline NBC will continue its torture of the human race by interviewing Eddie Murphy and Dan "Piscopo" Ackroyd about their feelings on it.

As if anyone cares.

Anyway, modern classic is one of those things that is apparent everywhere but rarely ever said. By somehow deeming something a 'classic' despite its newness doesn't make it anymore forgettable than another movie made back in 1982. I mean, come on, does anybody out there really want to celebrate the twentieth anniversary of a halfassed movie whose only true boast is that Jamie Lee Curtis continued her downward slide by 'baring' her breasts? Trust me, all the promos show this moment and I can tell you, it's not that interesting.

You could get more raunchiness out of the Lexx Bored Chat.

So, 'modern' or 'instant' classic is one big lie that tries to make movies memorable but only ends up making things look silly. Proof: Anybody remember 'Girlfight' or 'Bicentenial Man?'

posted 06-24-2001 11:18 PM            

Example?

Diana finds a prize in her Happy Meal when she goes to McD's with her father

And it turns into:

Diana finds her father

When the hell did McDs become a fucking Mecca for the suburbanites of the modern world? Do people flock to these places to kneel on the grimy greasy floor to pray at the counter? Do they give a coin to the always-present possibly-retarded janitor there? Do they don the regulation cheap shiny black slacks and threadbare polo shirts?

I mean, why the hell does the fucking place have to play itself as some kind of weird life affirming act instead of a way to ingest more toxins into one's body instead of sucking on a semi's exhaust. Indeed!

How sad do you have to be to find your father at a fucking restaurant?