posted 01-27-2002 03:40 AM            

Since I'm ill, I keep even odder hours than I usually do. And this means that while I'm pissing a little portion of my life away in bed or online, I can do a good/bad thing for absolutely no reason:

BAD:

I'm up late because I slept most of the day and I had no choice but to watch 'Road Rules' on MTV. And I finally figured it out: Hollywood is run by Nazis. And a result of this is MTV. Why, you ask? Because every black person on there is a whining little bastard with a mouth bigger than their guts. Not just one black person (or women, rather, this is apparently a female chapter of the KKK), but EVERY SINGLE ONE THAT APPEARS ON A MTV 'REALITY' SHOW. You could set your fucking watch to it.

To prove it's not the medication working, here is an example:

quote:

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SCENE: Six underweight and overtanned people sitting at a table eating food each group (separated by sex) has prepared. The women have fixed a meat dinner while the men have been forced by the producer to make a dish consisting of crickets, maggots, and various thing you usually step on.

NAMELESS WHITE MAN #1--I heartily enjoy this meal.

NAMELESS WHITE MAN #2--I sincerely hope that this is not something disgusting.

NAMELESS WHITE WOMAN #1--I assure you it is not <insert insult/current friendly slang term here>! But what is this we are eating?

NAMELESS WHITE MAN#3--I'm afraid the producers have made us cook a speciality dish made of insects.

NAMELESS WHITE WOMAN #1--Oh ho! While I feel this is a dirty trick, I also realize that in the nature of this show which I appear upon it is the norm. How foolish of me not to realize this. How I ache for you guys, who were forced into doing this for the same reason we all appear on this show: the hollow pursuit of fleeting fame.

TOKEN BLACK WOMAN: What?? Oh my God!! I dind't see this coming despite everything that has happened so far!! AHHHHHH!!

TBW runs out of room, screaming obscenities and into the bathroom, where she places her tongue underneath an unhygientic faucet and turns the cold tap on full.

NAMELESS WHITE MAN #2--I feel remorse for what we were forced to do, and question my intentions of being here.

NAMELESS WHITE MAN #1--I humbly apologize for our actions. We should have lived up to our bulbous and loud comments about being free and noble despite our actions.

NAMELESS WHITE WOMAN #1--I apologize as well, realizing that it was nothing but a perverse joke designed to anger us, fueling the sick need for people to watch these events. Let us maintain our dignity by pretending it was not a bad thing and with the knowledge that if the materials used for our insect dinner was not pure, MTV would surely be subjected to several lawsuits.

CUT TO TBW still screaming, pouring Ajax on her tongue, and tearing out the now-blistered first few layers of flesh from her tongue before coming back to the dining room.

TOKEN BLACK WOMAN: <a long diatribe in which she curses everybody involved while interjecting phrases which include where she comes from, respect, and possible threats and moral judgements which are repeated three to five times between every sentence in a very infantile way to achieve importance of her statements>

EVERYBODY: *rolls eyes*

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And so forth. Anyway, to counteract all of this, may I suggest...

BLACKMASK.COM!!

Are you looking for a book that you can't find or is hideously expensive? This site has all kinds of classic literture for FREE nad in a variety of formats. Check them out: they have a lot of good stuff that will enhance your mind. Fiction, non-fiction, and everything in between.

Well, off to bed with me before the hallcinations start.

posted 01-27-2002 10:50 AM         

Gypsy...being brave when you are that sick isn't very wise though, is it? Methinks Nicky has taken the right tack!